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| Name: Ryan Roe Email: prawnrr-rmv@this.com-yahoo.com Position: Movie / Television / Comic Book / Trivia Geek View Ryan's Personal Profile |
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| And now for another Inconsequential Anecdote from the Unabridged Biography of Ryan Roe… I went to high school in Uvalde, Texas, where we were the Coyotes. Please note: that’s not “ky-OH-tees,” but “KY-oats,” with the emphasis not on the second syllable but on bein’ Texan. Our team mascot character was a furry guy whose appearance was almost as copyright infringing as his name, which was Wiley… Wiley Coyote. There were few things as important at Uvalde High School as football – certainly band, theater and teaching kids stuff occupied lower slots on the school’s list of priorities. Uvalde’s biggest rivalry was with Tivy High School in nearby Kerrville, a school that had as its unlikely mascot the Antlers. I don’t know why they were just the antlers… perhaps they used to be the Deer, but they had lost various parts over the years. I was in marching band, in the drumline, and I loved playing at games and pep rallies with a passion that nearly rivaled my intense apathy toward the actual football. That’s why I was present at the off-campus, after-school-hours pep rally held in the town square the year the highly anticipated Uvalde/Tivy match-up fell on homecoming. It was immediately after the Homecoming parade, one of approximately 583 annual parades in Uvalde. As usual, the cheerleaders had painted signs and banners, but they were a bit more aggressive than usual. There were lots of “KILL TIVYs” and drawings of gravestones and coffins. As usual, a football player took the stage to mumble his way through something about the big game coming up, but he seemed more bloodthirsty than usual – I’m fairly certain the word “murder” came up. Then Coach Ebbetts* came up and reminded us all to wear black tomorrow for spirit day – in the spirit of death, apparently. He made an announcement. Somebody from our athletic department had managed to sneak into the Tivy locker rooms, he said, and they had stolen a pair of shorts from one of their cheerleaders. Here he held up a giant pair of Tivy shorts (which had obviously not actually come from a cheerleader) and there, in front of a crowd of fans hollering their frantic approval, he set fire to them, utterly destroying this icon of our hated enemies. I could do nothing but watch in disbelief as the huge fake cheerleader shorts went up in smoke. Next, the cheerleaders divided us into two groups and led us in a cheer, though it would perhaps more appropriately be called a chant. At the cheerleaders’ direction, the left group would all yell, “KILL TIVY!” and then the right group would scream, “BLOOD MAKES THE GRASS GROW!” And so on, and that is actually the cheer they asked us to do. Good sportsmanship didn’t have much of a place at that pep rally, because it was clearly more important to make sure everyone in Uvalde was sharing the same thoughts of homicide. I think the school did receive some complaints about that event, because the next year’s anti-Tivy pep rally was tamer and not nearly as obsessed with killing. At least, no more so than any other average pep rally. Also, it occurs to me that it’s a good thing no one from Tivy actually got killed at that Homecoming game. Uvalde sure would’ve been in a pickle then! And that’s the story of the Most Morbid Pep Rally in Texas. P.S.: That football game? Uvalde lost. *This is not his real name. I’ve changed it in the unlikely event that he ever finds this. Comments on this post are closed. |
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| The worst part is, if you had asked a Tivy student about the rivalry, they probably would have laughed because they didn't really consider us to be that big of a rival. I believe they cared a lot more about Fredericksburg than Uvalde. Oh well. And I'm pretty sure blood does not make the grass grow. Manure, yes. Blood, no. |
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| My goodness, I think I just overcame my jealousy of your idyllic high school experience (y'know, one with a band, and football games, and stories involving a "town square"). Thanks. My wistfulness has finally dissipated. |
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| Well, I mentioned my love for band. And that was the only pep rally devoted to the theme of murder, as far as I recall. So... the rest of it was pretty good. |
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| Oh my..the good ol' days at Uvalde High School. Now that I'm in KY they aren't as focused on football but instead basketball. Anyways..thanks for reminding me of just how much I'm missing in Uvalde. lol. |
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| Ah, it seems like only yesterday when I heard about one of those football speeches given by a player. By player, I mean a football guy, not my own former suave, handsome, chick magnet self. Anyway, that week's rival was Fredricksburg, which many know was settled by industrious Germans. The player reminded the audience that there was once a war in which the US fought against Germany, and that because of that he has always hated Germans (I'm paraphrasing--he used a politically incorrect term) and now, through this game, he and others on the team could get even for the war. The game was not even close. Uvalde lost. As a former player (the football kind, not the suave..never mind) I have been on the football team side of pep rallies and I didn't much enjoy the experience. Everyone looking at you, how are you to react? Is a "bored" expression more manly than a"fierce" one? Are you supposed to glower and look tough or give a little half smile/smirk in response to the attention and fuss, or should you like knock over some freshman or cross your arms and stare like a serial killer picking out the next victim. I for one think they should add to football drills and memorizing the playbook a session on appropriate pep rally behavior. One other thing. I played basketball too. Why aren't there ever huge pep rallies for the basketball team? Or the tennis team? And, if someone decided to do a pep rally for the band, how would THAT work? |
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| Nobody would ever do a pep rally for band, because nobody cares about the band. |
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